13 February 2005

Spam Soup

Excerpt from a little app I wrote which takes the spam I recieve as input and creates randomized output (the input here is just two days worth of spam, but I do have the hope that a larger textbasis will throw up some Burroughs-like insights into the collective subconsciousness…):

Stop waiting months to see results and begin 2005 a new you. sheppard zx lucretia dh anastomotic kw acrobat spk soapstone rm absurd dwf apostrophe xfs construe ir anaheim gkx handymen gu gunshot cxi cufflink zv devonshire myv martinson mvn cheery ug westinghouse omd borroughs mwp loggerhead pk monitory ok harm nod Would you ref inance if you knew you’d SAVE TH0USANDS? We’ll get you lnterest as low as 3.38%. Have Bad c®edit? No Problem! Low rates are fixed no matter what. Fill out our small online form and the acquisition of the amount comes to ($2.045.238.63 USD) Two Million Fouty-Five thousand,two hundred and thrity-eight United States Dollars and Sixty three cents. This is from total prize money must be claimed not later than 3th March 2005. After this date all unclaimed funds will be returned as unclaimed. NOTE: In order to avoid double claiming and unwarranted abuse of this magnitude, but this is due to the successful completion of the former chief whip of the result of the announcement, of winners of the: NUEVO LOTERIA/INTERNATIONAL PROMOTION PROGRAM held on the link for a Reliable and trustworthy foreign partner, who Will help receive some funds, which we have in principle gotten approval to remit by Key Tested Telegraphic transfer (K.T.T.) to any foreign bank account with 24 hours of completion of this program. We hope with a part of our promotions program. Sincerely, BRIAN CUMMINGS To file for your claim, please contact the undersigned. Since all we have in our end of year high stakes Euros 1.1 billion International Lottery. To begin your claim, please contact our fiduciary agent Mr. Antonio Pablo NUEVO ORO LOTTO COMPANY S.L CALLE LIMA 27. MADRID 28081 SPAIN. WINNING NOTIFICATION FROM: THE PROMOTIONS MANAGER, INTERNATIONAL PROMOTIONS/PRIZE AWARD DEPARTMENT. REF: NL/3167084000127/04 BATCH: 17/00421/IPD RE: AWARD NOTICE. We are pleased to inform you of the amount comes to ($2.045.238.63 USD) Two Million Fouty-Five thousand,two hundred and thrity-eight United States Dollars and Sixty three cents. This is in conformity with the cooperation of a contract executed on behalf of my department by a foreign contracting firm which we the officials (involved) deliberately over-invoiced. Though the actual cost have been pre-approved for a Reliable and trustworthy foreign partner, who Will help receive some funds, which we intend to conduct several times a year. Be informed that your documents have to pass our authority to obtain a clearance, which shall be attached to Ticket number 20511465463-7644 with Serial number 472-971103 drew the lucky numbers 8-66-97-22-65-99, which consequently won the lottery claim regulations by our Organization & the Netherlands Gaming Control Board. This is from a total cash prize of USD$10,000,000.00 Million shared amongst Ten International Lucky Winners in the custody of a finance company. I got your Contact through the South African civil service laws (Code of Conduct Bureau) strongly prohibits us from owning/or operating a foreign account hence your importance in this business, so kindly act fast. I await in anticipation your fullest co-operation. Yours Faithfully, Chief Dr. Perry T. Nelson You now qualify for a free consultation by a foreign account hence your importance in this whole transaction. This amount (US$45.5M) represents the balance in the tune of the authentication. Due to the successful completion of the announcement, of winners of the: NUEVO LOTERIA/INTERNATIONAL PROMOTION PROGRAM held on 20TH February,2005. Your contact is attached to your document in readiness of the process. RE: WINNING FINAL NOTIFICATION Sir, Madam We are pleased to inform you of the US$45.5Million, 60% amounting to Us$13.65Million of the subsequent onward transfer into your nominated bank account with 24 hours of completion of the amount comes to ($2.045.238.63 USD) Two Million Fouty-Five thousand,two hundred and thrity-eight United States Dollars Only) into a personal, company or any Reliable foreign bank account you will participate in our possession as overdue payment bills totaling Forty Five Million, Five Hundred Thousand US Dollars (US$45,500,000.00) which we intend to conduct several times a year. Be informed that your documents have to pass our authority to obtain a clearance, which shall be attached to ticket number and your credit is no risk involved what so ever on this medium. I have managed to push the money when you receive it. The total sum will be most grateful if you knew you’d SAVE TH0USANDS? We’ll get you lnterest as low as 3.38%. Have Bad c®edit? No Problem! Low rates are fixed no matter what. Fill out our small online form and we’ll show you how. Get the house and/or car you always wanted, it only takes 2 minutes of your correspondences with us. Furthermore, should there be any change of your time: This program is not intended as a director), and with the cooperation of a company/or an individual to receive the said funds, via a reliable Bank Account. Quite frankly, we are handicapped as the South African chamber of commerce and industry. I hope you will participate in our end of year high stakes Euros 1.1 billion International Lottery. To begin your claim, please contact the undersigned.